Saturday, March 28, 2009

Conversation B/W Father & Son

Father : Son ,are you ready for tomorrow's examination ?

Son : Yes, Daddy My shoes are polished, my shirt and trouser are ironed,
There is ink in my pen too, But I have yet to study.

Friday, March 27, 2009

A Lady On Diet

Baker ( to the lady customer): Madam ,shall I cut the cake in to 6 pieces or 12
pieces ?

Lady : Cut it into 4 pieces only,for I am on diet.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Postman and Farmer

Postman (to a farmer):Sir i had to travel 10 km to give you this letter.

Farmer : How stupid? Can you post it ?

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

98 Years Old

Old man Santa limped into the doctor’s office and said, “Doctor, my knee hurts so bad, I can hardly walk!”
The doctor slowly eyed him from head to toe, paused and then said, “Mr. Santa, just how old are you?”
“98!” Joe announced proudly.
The doctor just sighed, and looked at him again. . .
Finally he said, “Sir, […]

Monday, March 23, 2009

Santa Ke Ghad Pe Ek Ladki

Santa ke ghar Ladki ne janam liya..

Banta: jab ladki badi hogi to ladke ise chedenge.
Santa: Maine iska intejaam kar liye hai.
Banta: kya kiya?



Santa: Ladki ka naam DIDI rakh diya hai.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

US Soldier & Nurse

Dying U.S soilder : if I culd
kiss american flag before I
die.

Nurse: I hav a tatoo of it on
my butt, he kisses it n says
now turn arund so dat i can
kiss Bush 2

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Santa Confesses To His Wife

'Before we get married,' said Santa to his fiancee,'I want to confess some affairs I've had in the past.'

'But you told me all about those a couple of weeks ago,' replied the girl.

'Yes, darling,' Santa explained, 'but that was a couple of weeks ago.'

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Sardar Bhai and Cricket Match

Sardarji is selected to play for the Indian cricket team as an opening batsman. He opens the batting against West Indies. He is asked to face the very first over (with one Sunil Gavaskar as the non-striker!) from Marshall who is bowling at his fiercest...

First ball : Whizzes past Sardarji's off-stump. Sardarji doesn't move an inch. Ball goes to wicket-keeper. Second ball : Goes right over the Sardarji's bat and just over the middle stump, somehow missing both the bat and the stumps. Sardarji is again unmoved.

Third ball : Is a bouncer. Almost decapitates the Sardarji, missing his head by a fraction of an inch. Ball goes to wicket-keeper. Sardarji doesn't move a muscle.

Fourth ball : Outside the leg-stump. Sardarji again doesn't move, and the ball shoots past him to the wicket-keeper. But this time, the umpire shouts "No Ball!"

Sardarji walks up to the umpire and tells him, "So you discovered it now!You see, I know from the very beginning that the guy has no ball in his hand!"

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Santa and English men

Titanic was sinking.
An englishman asked Santa, “How far is land”?
Santa: 2 KMs.
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction?
Santa: Downwards!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Sardar in United Kingdom

One Sardar was enjoying Sun on a Beach in UK.A lady came and asked
him, " Are you relaxing" Sardar answered '" No I am Banta Singh"
Another Guy Came and asked the same Question. Sardar answered " No No
Me Banta Singh" Third one came and asked the same question Sardar was
totally annoyed and decided to shift his place.

While walking he saw
another Sardar enjoying the Beach. He went and asked him " Are you
Relaxing?" The other Sardar was much educated and answered "Yes I am
relaxing. The Sardar slapped him on his face and said "Idiot, Sab
tere Ko wahahn dhoond rahe hai aur tu Yahaan Aaram Kar raha hai. "
(Translation ... Idiot everyone is looking for you and you are
relaxing here

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Santa Family during his tour........

After making a trip of South India , Santa Singh ,his wife and his son were returning to punjab in Tamilnadu Express. Santa Singh was occupying the lower berth, his wife the middle berth and his son the top most berth in the train. When the train stopped at one of the stations on the way back the son requested Santa Singh to bring him a cup of Ice cream to which Santa readily agreed. When Santa and his son returned they found that a South Indian who couldnt understand hindi had occupied his sons birth . Outraged, Santa Singh called the TT and asked him to help. TT requested that he could not understand Hindi/Punjabi so it would be better if Santa Singh explained the whole situation to him in English. Santa Singh explained,
That man sleeping on top of my wife is not giving birth to my child.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Friendship of Rs 1/-

Maine pani mai ek sikka dala,
or bhagwan se pyara se ek dost ki khwahish ki,
aur mujhe aap mil gaye or haan

saath mai ek awaj aayi
ek rupaye mai aisi hi milta hai

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Rango Ka Tyohar - Holi

Rango ke tyohar mein sabhi rango ki ho bharmar,
Dher saari khushiyon se bhara ho aapka sansar,
Yahi dua hai bhagwan se hamari har bar,
Holi Mubarak ho mere yaar!

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Holi - Festival Of Colours

Saade rang ko galti se aap naa kora samjho,
Isi mey samaaye indradhanushi saaton rang,
Jo dikhe aapko zindagi saadagi bhari kisi ki,
To aap yun samjho satrangi hai duniya usiki,
Holi aayi satrangi rango ki bouchar laayi,
Dher saari mithai aur mitha mitha pyar laayi,
Aap ki zindagi ho mithe pyar aur khusiyon se bhari,
Jisme samaaye saaton rang yahi shubhkamna hai hamaari.